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I thanked him for his interest, but let him know that that wouldn't be happening. He asked me to reconsider and retain “an open mind.” I felt frustration and anger boil up inside me as I looked at this man three decades my senior, who had manipulated me into a meeting under false pretences and then dismissed my refusal of his advances as close-minded. Instead, I ignored his emails until he finally gave up.
Being hit on by men who are considerably older was not new to me.
(And though he constantly disparaged her for it while they were together, he also grudgingly admitted he chose her for “school smarts", too).
Plus, being so young, she was “more likely to put up with him,” he said.
I specified that I would date men in their early thirties to early forties - “no exceptions", I wrote.
A few men didn't listen, but I managed to weed out most of them.
But just as I was about to leave, Bob admitted that he was not that interested in me as a writing coach, but as a romantic prospect. Yet when I rejected him, he looked stung and startled, as though he was completely unaware of our significant age difference.
Such mansplaining is one of the many reasons I don't want to date significantly older men.
While sexism knows no age barrier, in my experience, the older men I've met are far less likely to treat me as an equal.
Dating much younger women seems to stem from these men's unhealthy and unrealistic obsession with youth – perhaps a way to stave off fears of their own mortality.
In fact, such a lopsided romance is my origin story.